I Broke Down....

and told someone. I had to. I had all these emotions and I needed to share with someone. Someone who would understand and be able to talk me through it all. My husband is wonderful and I have cried and vented to him many a times. But he just doesn't understand. He's never been pregnant or had a miscarriage and though he's been through the emotions with me, the physical is something else, something only another woman would understand.
I know there are probably some of you reading this after the fact and wondering "why didn't she tell me"....and the honest answer is, you weren't the right person. There was only really one person who can understand it all and who will just tell me the way it is. So a big THANK YOU to Auntie B for being my emotional sounding board, reference source and warm cozy hug these weeks. You have helped me more than you know....and I truly appreciate it, and so does Fluffernutter.

Doctor Visit #2

I had my second doctors appointment today. I had to fill out my complete medical history, as well as my family's, Daddy's and Daddy's family. Talk about a pain in the ASS. Then the nurse drew a crap ton of blood, and of course my stupid veins wouldn't cooperate and she had to try two different places. I am pleased to say that I did NOT pass out, but I came close. So all is good for now. I just have to wait on the results of the blood work. My next appointment is next Tuesday. It's the visit with my OBGYN. She will probably do a sonogram, but it may be too soon to hear a heart beat and she may send me for an ultrasound to check and be sure everything is as it should be. I'm still nervous, but I feel better counting down each step and each week til I know I'm safe and I can tell everyone the news.

Mini Breakdown

Had a little bit of a breakdown today. I'm in a very odd position. Instead of being happy about being pregnant, I"m terrified. I mean I am happy, but there is an underlying fear. Instead of coming up with a cute way to tell Daddy I was pregnant, like I did the first time, I just sort of showed him the stick. We both had a very subdued response. Deep down I know we are both over the moon, but we're also both very worried. During the day I'm on pins and needles, every twitch and twinge causes my heart to skip a beat. I worry that I"m not "sick enough" (no puking, but I do have flaming butt), that my boobs aren't sore enough all sorts of things. I know that stress is the worse thing for me, but with a miscarriage so fresh in my mind, it's hard to ignore. So I had a good cry on my husband and got some good cuddles and I"m going to try to not worry so much. My second doctors appointment is in 4 days, we'll make it to that and then move onto the next. One day at a time. I have to believe that Fluffernutter is fine and I will be holding him/her in my arms next spring.

Welcome

Welcome to my new blog. For all of you who are reading this months later...Sorry, but I wouldn't tell anyone until we knew we were out of the woods.

So welcome to my journal of my pregnancy. You may ask why this blog is called "The Fluffernutter Kid". Well, right at the beginning of my pregnancy, I was craving Fluffernutters, it's sort of how I knew I was pregnant. Well that and the fact that I have a nose like a blood hound.

I had dr. appointment today, but all they did is confirm that yes indeed I am pregnant, so next week I go for more testing and the following week I go for my first OBGYN.

I'll check back later when more is to be told...

Right now I"m going to try to NOT freak out toooooo badly!